Factory Sealed
244 episodes - last episode 01 May 2022

It’s time to gather round your console and join the finest gaming community in all the land. If you are looking for equal parts random life story and absurd video game analysis, then join hosts Eric, Dan, and Tom every few weeks for a light-hearted, tangent-filled romp through gaming history.
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Sat, 06 Aug 2022
It's time for the annual pilgrimage to MoCon! Will the lads have the same hotel room? Will they survive? Will Zack be arrested? It's all possible at MoCon! Outside of this year's shenanigans, we also have a brutal time trying to slog through Brutal Legend.
 length: 01:46:13
Sat, 02 Jul 2022
The horse may have died long before it got to Eric, but that won't stop us flogging it even further as we return after a two month hiatus! Hear all about Eric's cross-country move, the heroes of Britain, what we've been playing (or not playing!), and our thoughts on all of the latest big announcements including Final Fantasy VII: Rebirth, Starfield, and more.
 length: 01:20:23
Sun, 01 May 2022
Gotta go...slow? We play Sonic CD, discuss Dan's patio, what we've been playing and Eric's impending country-wide trip to move house.
 length: 01:37:08
Mon, 25 Apr 2022
Former host turned celebrity guest Tom Ragan emerges from the rural recesses of Mooseland to talk about homeownership, Elden Ring, F1, and open a ton of mystery digital games.
 length: 01:50:29
Mon, 21 Mar 2022
Eric and Zack managed to peel themselves off the couch long enough to lament over buying and selling houses, reminisce about ancient methods of storage, and absolutely gush over Elden Ring.
 length: 02:22:53
Wed, 02 Mar 2022
Dan and Eric tear themselves away from Elden Ring to question the morals of making robots in Binary Domain, making them question whether they are actually self aware in the process.
 length: 01:26:23
Sun, 30 Jan 2022
Join us as we Enter the Matrix, a fabricated world of shite gameplay! Also includes Nobody Saves the World, Mass Effect, and Eric somehow finishing a game before Dan.
 length: 01:49:04
Mon, 10 Jan 2022
The whole crew reunites for the first time in months for our fabled Game of the Year show! Which titles took our top spots this year?
 length: 04:33:10
Sun, 09 Jan 2022
The whole crew reunites for the first time in months for our fabled Game of the Year show! Which titles took our top spots this year?
 length: 04:33:11
Mon, 20 Dec 2021
We round out 2021 with a concise little show featuring The Matrix Awakens, Eric's new Series X, Halo Infinite, and Dan's annual descent into playing games that are too long.
 length: 00:58:02
Sun, 05 Dec 2021
We're back! Join us to laugh at Steve Burton's terrible voice acting in Resident Evil: Code Veronica X and listen to us chat about all kinds of rubbish ranging from this year's Game Awards to Eric finally buying Stadia.
 length: 01:42:59
Sun, 10 Oct 2021
Sparkly thigh boots at the ready as we head out on our annual pilgrimage to MoCon where too much money is spent, hotel rooms are destroyed, and very bad food is eaten. Upon our return, we stop off at the Mall of Willamette which appears to have been taken over by zombies (not really, we're playing Dead Rising).
 length: 02:16:33
Sun, 03 Oct 2021
Three Moosecopters have just landed to bring you the skinny on Psychonauts 2, Deathloop, unMetal, and RE8 as Edge to Edge Gaming edges (get it??) closer to satisfaction: Ownership of the 2021 Fantasy Critic Crown.
 length: 01:39:31
Sun, 12 Sep 2021
Join us aboard the MooseJet as we travel to the wonderfully absurd, minigame-filled world of The Misadventures of Tron Bonne... which is technically a Mega Man game.
 length: 02:21:17
Sun, 15 Aug 2021
Tom makes his buttery 2021 debut to show off his DS, talk about the current state of collecting, reminisce about PS2 era Grand Theft Auto, and dive into the musically awful world of Chinatown Wars.
 length: 02:27:26
Sun, 08 Aug 2021
The fabled Russian Keeper of the Dates, Bobov August finally arrives with an accurate calendar to get us back on track and talking about failed DIY, Skyward Sword HD, Switch OLED, Marvel's Avengers, and the PS5 NVME Beta.
 length: 01:44:17
Sun, 18 Jul 2021
Come with us on a magical journey through our special tunnel, featuring stops at Super Mario Galaxy 2, Skyward Sword HD, and Eric's expanded collection.
 length: 01:47:06
Sun, 27 Jun 2021
A full crew descends upon the mics to share their thoughts on Final Fantasy 7 Remake Intermission, Ratchet and Clank Rift Apart, Chivalry 2 and Dark Alliance while trying to unravel the mystery of how two grown men managed to get stuck to their kitchen floors in the same week.
 length: 02:29:11
Sun, 06 Jun 2021
Eric and Mike reluctantly press record after discovering their opinions on Terranigma appear to be completely unshared by anyone else in the world.
 length: 02:07:27
Sun, 23 May 2021
A rare case of "seriousness" overcomes the crew with the Returnal of General Spendington to discuss accessibility in video games, Resident Evil 8, and our favorite tinfoil hat video game urban legends.
 length: 02:16:57
Sun, 16 May 2021
We were hoping to find a spaceship at the end of Star Wars Rogue Squadron II: Rogue Leader, but all we found was a crappy Buick.
 length: 02:21:39
Sun, 02 May 2021
Issac Clarke is just a footlong away from surviving the hideandseeknomorphs, babynomorphs and jumpnomorphs of Dead Space 2; all that he needs to finish them off for good is for Eric to finish watching Wayne's World first.
 length: 02:04:49
Sun, 11 Apr 2021
Even eating the largest wheel of cheese has never left us wanting to fart nearly as bad as playing Oddworld: Soulstorm. But how much does a missing fart really affect the rest of the game? As it turns out... a lot.
 length: 01:46:33
Sun, 28 Mar 2021
Context is everything - particularly when Mike launches a podcast about his dreams (and possibly other parts of his body) while the rest of us play through classic Final Fantasy VII spin-off, Crisis Core. Anyway... here's Wonderwall.
 length: 02:59:02
Sun, 28 Feb 2021
We discuss both the State of Play and the State of Mike's Lawn, as well as update our fantasy league standings
 length: 01:52:59
Sun, 21 Feb 2021
Eric and Zack talk about poor financial decisions and proper friendship etiquette while holding each other's feet to the fire in a forced trudge through Dark Souls 2
 length: 01:13:44
Sun, 14 Feb 2021
It's another special romantic edition of Factory Sealed! Take a seat, relax, and let us bring you your game of the month - Baldur's Gate: Dark Alliance. And for afters, we've got a very special box of chocolates for you.
 length: 02:19:23
Sun, 31 Jan 2021
The whole Gamestonks adventure attracts our attention as Eric dabbles in the stock market, and everyone unsuccessfully tries to explain how it works to Dan. Meanwhile, the lads start a new venture, competing against each other in a video game draft league for the next year!
 length: 02:06:17
Sun, 17 Jan 2021
Looking for the ultimate getaway? Join us as we visit Isle Delfino (in Mario Sunshine) where you can bask in the sunshite, butter your feet, and be accused of rampant vandalism.
 length: 02:09:37
Sun, 03 Jan 2021
It's the very first episode of Sidequests, part of the Factory Sealed Podcast network! Join Eric, Dan, Tom and Mike as they list their top 10 games of 2020, tell you what we're all about, and get started with our exciting new venture!
 length: 04:23:07
Sun, 03 Jan 2021
Time's are a changing! This is just a quick announcement regarding the new show we just launched called Factory Sealed - Sidequests.
 length: 00:04:11
Sun, 20 Dec 2020
A mysterious house filled with puzzles, monsters, and a suspicious man in tight denim shorts waiting to put holes in our discs awaits us as we tackle the Gamecube remake of Resident Evil.
 length: 02:28:27
Sun, 06 Dec 2020
Expect much splurging about the PS5 just before Vincenzo Valentine is back from his Italian Escape to battle the forces of Deepground in Dirge of Cerberus: Final Fantasy VII.
 length: 02:11:51
Sun, 15 Nov 2020
A new generation is upon us, but we're still in a dream as we play stealthy jungle classic Metal Gear Solid 3: Snek Eator, while Eric is forced to stymie his excitement over getting a PS5 a week before everyone else.
 length: 03:23:16
Sun, 25 Oct 2020
Who needs professionals qualified to do their jobs? We can get through Fatal Frame (well, Dan can) armed only with a camera and a giant ladder borrowed from a decorator.
 length: 02:38:53
Sun, 11 Oct 2020
Two become one as Eric and Mike freshen up with a new scent, share some pillow talk about the PS5 and Xbox Series X, and spank some monkeys in Ape Escape.
 length: 03:00:56
Sun, 27 Sep 2020
Back in the day we only had the PS5 to pre-order, filthy cakes to buy, and Nazis to shoot in Return to Castle Wolfenstein...and we were happy. And we were grateful.
 length: 02:47:26
Sat, 12 Sep 2020
We're getting all hot at the thought of playing Parasite Eve, but then our temperatures really start flaring off the scale because of Mike's very interesting shower designs.
 length: 02:45:54
Sun, 30 Aug 2020
We've got a significant hard-on for several games this week, including Mortal Shell, Fall Guys, Salt and Sanctuary, and Microsoft Flight Simulator, but it unfortunately gets downgraded to a semi for the second half of Grandia.
 length: 02:54:17
Sun, 02 Aug 2020
The Summer RPG returns once again as we join Justin and Sue for an adventure through the first half of Grandia! - Also included is an extended discussion on unusual bathroom hygiene/snacks, easy mode t-shirts, and Mike's massive Xbox fanboy.
 length: 03:07:19
Sun, 28 Jun 2020
This show is a triumph and we're making a note here - huge success, as we tackle Valve's puzzling classic Portal.
 length: 02:18:27
Sun, 14 Jun 2020
Samoose is once again loose aboot this hoose as we boot up Metroid Prime, gush over the big PS5 reveal, and give Eric a very special new job in our impromptu band.
 length: 02:26:10
Sun, 17 May 2020
Alan's constantly losing his trusty flashlight and fighting against both a nonsensical plot and a Dark Presence as we tackle Remedy's psychological thriller, Alan Wake!
 length: 02:45:30
Sun, 26 Apr 2020
It's finally here! Final Fantasy 7 Remake is out and we've all beaten it! Join us for both a spoiler-free analysis and - if you've finished it - a full spoilery chat too! Hey, at least it isn't Zelda.
 length: 04:03:55
Sun, 05 Apr 2020
The Half-Life of this twaddle of a show may have come and gone, but that isn't gonna stop us! We polish off our finest crowbar, fight off the giant testicle aliens of the original Half Life, and talk about Mike and Dan's early copies of Final Fantasy VII Remake.
 length: 03:33:31
Sun, 22 Mar 2020
We've reached our monumental 200th episode! Let's celebrate by recapping Tom's bachelor party, playing some Super Mario World, and listening to your amazing messages.
 length: 04:35:42
Sun, 08 Mar 2020
Unwisely once again, Dan and Mike let Eric loose talking about Mega Man Zero... at great length. There's plenty of time to splurge everywhere over the Final Fantasy VII Remake Demo at length beforehand though!
 length: 03:02:26
Mon, 24 Feb 2020
Grab your vibrating kneecaps as we pit Penis Thrust Man, Lady Butt Cheeks, and Mini-Me against hordes of enemies in an attempt to decide which of the first three Golden Axe games is superior.
 length: 02:11:52
Sun, 16 Feb 2020
Near, far, wherever you are, close the top half of your door, cozy up in your meat sweats, and gaze far across the distance into the Sonic movie you've seen every night in your Dreams before dozing off to Revenge of Shinobi, which feels like it was made to last for a lifetime.
 length: 02:40:42
Sun, 02 Feb 2020
Pop an Alka Seltzer and join us for some context-sensitive fun through Conker’s Bad Fur Day; an adventure that incorporates giant operatic shit mountains, sadistic teddy bears, Liverpudlian dung beetles and a short, cat-hating grim reaper. No, we didn’t make that up.
 length: 02:55:37
Sun, 12 Jan 2020
It's the return of the fabled two man show with Eric and Dan as they try to lay the groundations for a fantastic year and rearrangel all of the facts to understand .Hack//Infection.
 length: 02:19:46
Mon, 30 Dec 2019
2019 started with a bang and just kept going full tilt the whole way through. This left us to mull over the truly staggering number of games we played this year and whittle them down to our top 10; resulting in some rather unique lists.
 length: 04:46:41
Mon, 23 Dec 2019
Fresh off a single day of training, Leon Kennedy shows off his expertise at fighting Gonads in Resident Evil 4; armed with a collection of weaponry bought with potatoes.
 length: 03:29:35
Mon, 02 Dec 2019
The crisis of dinosaurs continues in Dino Crisis 2, stopping over for a delivery in Death Stranding first, more lamenting over Stadia, and a bit of time for a good old laugh at Elon Musk’s low-res truck thingy.
 length: 02:40:23
Mon, 18 Nov 2019
Join ManBat on a quest to thwart the evil machinations of Squarecrow (and Eric has something to admit) in Batman Arkham Asylum, dump a truck load of manure on Stadia, gush all over Death Stranding, and discuss how Pokemon can be bastards in Pokemon Sword and Shield.
 length: 03:12:26
Sun, 03 Nov 2019
Mime jokes and pot roast wheels chart the course for a trip through Super Mario Galaxy with a side of Luigi’s Mansion 3, Death Stranding, and a straddle contest winner.
 length: 03:19:48
Mon, 28 Oct 2019
Grab onto your Gamecube handle and get in shape with some (Coin) Ring Fit Adventure, press your cremated remains into your favorite game, and force your way through Luigi’s Mansion.
 length: 03:30:38
Mon, 07 Oct 2019
Hold on to your sanity! The whole crew is back to tackle Eternal Darkness: Sanity’s Requiem various creams, more Link’s Awakening, and Dan finally snaps at Eric’s collectathon nonsense.
 length: 03:21:36
Mon, 23 Sep 2019
Climb aboard Moosecopter 1 for a scenic tour of the rising Canadian lake levels, Link’s Awakening Remastered, a weird Nintendo circle, and some genuinely dark themes in Final Fantasy Crystal Chronicles: Ring of Fates.
 length: 02:39:51
Mon, 09 Sep 2019
Horror abounds as we navigate the terrifying woods of the Blair Witch, discover the true nature of pantyhose, and venture into The Mark of Kri without the safety of our nostalgia-coated, rose-tinted glasses.
 length: 02:56:13
Sun, 25 Aug 2019
Oi, wanker, you’re going the wrong way! There is a sign – a sign that we are playing everyone’s favorite cockney car crashing, heavy breathing game, The Getaway.
 length: 02:37:02
Sun, 11 Aug 2019
Which is worse: Being straddled by a nine foot tall gentlemen with an 80 syllable name on your annual pilgrimage to MoCon? Or playing Zelda II?
 length: 02:50:56
Sun, 28 Jul 2019
Grab your bottle of Savior Soak, give old blinky a check, and clean out your lug holes! We’re back to polish off the rest of Kingdom Hearts with our brand new recording equipment.
 length: 03:27:48
Sun, 30 Jun 2019
Don’t be alarmed, this is just a test of our ability to play an RPG over the summer! Join us aboard our poorly constructed gummi ships to revisit Kingdom Hearts in the first of two episodes and be treated to random singing and more terrible Zelda puns than you can ask for.
 length: 03:14:34
Sun, 16 Jun 2019
You were promised a return of Factory Sealed, and we delivered! Join us to discuss the highs and lows of E3, our fears of an all-streaming future, and whether a bloke says D or T in Fable.
 length: 02:48:56
Tue, 04 Jun 2019
Don’t worry, we aren’t dead! We just put ‘er in P for a little bit. But we’ll be back on June 16th! (If you’re recording says May 16th, that’s an error.)
 length: 00:01:07
Mon, 06 May 2019
Grab your soldering iron and your light saber for a trip through the terrible teeth of Sonic the Hedgehog Movie into the loving arms of cable-free VR with the Oculus Quest, before stopping off at Star Wars the Force Unleashed.
 length: 02:24:54
Sun, 21 Apr 2019
Wal-Mart bathroom enthusiast Zack Fawley joins us to talk about video game preservation, the future of gaming, and some PlayStation 5 speculation before we sit back and listen to him rhapsodize about Castlevania: Symphony of the Night.
 length: 02:38:08
Sun, 07 Apr 2019
We get behind the cockpit (literally) of Jehuty in Zone of the Enders, die a lot in Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice, spot off for some Outlaw Tennis in hell and figure out whether there may, or may not, be Endors.
 length: 01:25:46
Thu, 04 Apr 2019
Eric and Tom meet up in Phoenix to put on some silly hats, create a few new Mega Man robot masters, and opine over the future of gaming with Google Stadia before dissecting one of the few good movie game tie-ins; The Chronicles of Riddick: Escape from Butcher Bay.
 length: 01:59:56
Sun, 10 Mar 2019
Whether you’re a fan of soapy baps, priests lacking on fuel, or the classic FPS Halo: Combat Evolved, we’ve got Ig-YOU-wana covered!
 length: 03:07:19
Mon, 25 Feb 2019
We take a break from facing off against Father Gascoigne to share an important fact with you: Gex is called Gex because he is a Gecko. Trust us on this one.
 length: 02:25:08
Mon, 11 Feb 2019
The lads are back from their trip to Freedomland, loaded with stories ranging from breaking toilets to bundling at Rumbles. With additional chats about the Resident Evil 2 remake, Kingdom Hearts 3, and the Genesis ‘Classic’ Ghostbusters.
 length: 02:55:21
Wed, 16 Jan 2019
We take to the skies for some Ace Combat 4, contemplate zombies in the Resident Evil 2 Remake, and make an attractive new headpiece for our bovine cousins.
 length: 01:36:04
Mon, 31 Dec 2018
2018 has came and gone in a blaze of boiled owls, shabba, and bad opticians jokes. There’s only one way to celebrate – finding our top ten games we played in 2018!
 length: 03:53:54
Tue, 18 Dec 2018
A massive technical glitch fries Dan’s potato, losing nearly two hours of content in the process. So, we are packing our bags and moving to sunny South America. Why? Just Cause.
 length: 01:22:30
Wed, 05 Dec 2018
It’s a shabba-tastic episode as we find out whether Devil May Cry (Or Not), introduce the FS Hoctopus, and discuss whether the PS Classic is worth the bother.
 length: 02:11:00
Mon, 19 Nov 2018
Join us on Edna’s bike ride through the Rockstar hit Bully, stopping off at interesting locales including Yorkshire Pokemon and Eric’s Driving School.
 length: 01:48:34
Tue, 06 Nov 2018
We pop the show into Space D and rid the Ishimura of its wiggly arm monster infestation in Dead Space; stopping off for a bit of Rootin-Tootin Horsey-Shootin’ in Red Dead Redemption 2 first.
 length: 02:28:24
Mon, 15 Oct 2018
It’s the inevitable Mega Man episode – Zack and Dan are on hand with tranquilizer guns trained on Eric as we tackle Mega Man 1-6 (and 11).
 length: 02:30:05
Tue, 25 Sep 2018
Hop in the SmoothMobile and join Eric and Dan on a trip to the shores of Hell as we play Ultimate DOOM.
 length: 02:12:00
Tue, 11 Sep 2018
Dish yourself up a bra full of soup, check your accidental incest app, and slap on your off-centered face because we’re swinging our way through Spider-Man on the PlayStation.
 length: 02:23:28
Mon, 27 Aug 2018
We go Beyond Oasis (and the realms of good taste) as we chat emulation, while being baffled by the WonderSwan, and new a brand new Greek superhero, PissEyes.
 length: 02:48:15
Tue, 21 Aug 2018
Video game collector turned side-saddle bathroom soccer star, Zack Fawley joins us on our trip back to Rapture as we cover the original Bioshock. Now, would you kindle stop by the Circus of Value? We hear they are running a special on eye replacements.
 length: 02:43:35
Sun, 29 Jul 2018
We open (and potentially close) the door on the Sega Saturn library as we discuss its role in crippling the once mighty Sega before taking flight with our subconscious in the mysterious NiGHTS into Dreams.
 length: 02:20:56
Sun, 15 Jul 2018
It’s the final stretch of Final Fantasy IX as we tackle discs 3 and 4, armed only with our very unusual glow in the dark lightsabers.
 length: 02:52:54
Mon, 02 Jul 2018
With a why-aye and a Rally-Ho we tackle disc 2 of Final Fantasy IX. Meanwhile, Mike survives a visit to Hett, and we talk E3 2018.
 length: 03:03:51
Mon, 11 Jun 2018
We delve way too deep into the history of the mystical land of Hett, predict E3 2018, and analyze the hell out of Final Fantasy IX disc 1.
 length: 03:50:44
Sun, 20 May 2018
Join Eric-san and Mike-san on a quest to level up their raisin swords and butcher a bunch of Japanese names in Onimusha: Warlords.
 length: 02:26:56
Mon, 14 May 2018
It’s time for a trip down the highway at Full Throttle! Join us as we put our pedals to the metal on an epic road trip to everyone’s favorite store, Ar-Goes.
 length: 02:16:53
Tue, 24 Apr 2018
Dan’s back from Australia to save the show once again as we talk about Nintendo Labo, God of War and also talk about God of War.
 length: 01:56:45
Wed, 04 Apr 2018
BEAP BEAP! Eric and Mike pile into a semi full of Rocky bidets, flattening Dan on their way to discuss, Celeste, Ni No Kuni II, and Donkey Kong Country.
 length: 01:50:17
Mon, 19 Mar 2018
Dan left for Other Hett (aka Australia) and Mike destroyed his car, leaving Eric and Tom to discuss how Solid Snake would feel about Sam Fischer’s stealth technique in Splinter Cell.
 length: 02:29:14
Sun, 04 Mar 2018
(Illusion of) Gaia Guys! We’re off to the Tower of Bagel to sample those sweet, sweet erbs on Craig’s finest Vag InvisiBagels.
 length: 02:17:39
Mon, 05 Feb 2018
Mike may be on the brink of death, but he still struggles in to chat Oddworld: Stranger’s Wrath and to patent the must-have gift for 2018, the Nintendo Lavo.
 length: 01:39:18
Thu, 25 Jan 2018
Bundle up, pile on, and protect your ribs! It’s time to polish off Metal Gear Solid 2 (this time with less David Hayter and more nonsense.)
 length: 02:41:38
Sun, 07 Jan 2018
Move over Solite Snack, the REAL Solid Snake, David Hayter, is here to talk Metal Gear Solid 2 for Factory Sealed’s monumental 150th episode!
 length: 01:08:32
Tue, 26 Dec 2017
It’s that time again where we look back fondly on the year and share our favorite games, memories, and moments from 2017. Thanks for another wonderful year, everyone!
 length: 01:59:58
Mon, 11 Dec 2017
Yes, this is a Factory Sealed episode, and yes, you are hearing a LOT of game chat. We refine our already impeccable segues, play some Jak and Daxter, splurge over Mega Man 11, and crown the winner of the Annual Factory Sealed Straddle competition.
 length: 02:25:52
Tue, 28 Nov 2017
Mike gives a new voice to Mickey that nobody wanted to hear while Dan stands in line to look at a window. But at the end of the day, it was all just an illuuuuuuuuuuuuuuusion.
 length: 01:39:07
Tue, 21 Nov 2017
Mike breaks his record and heads off to Mexico, leaving Eric, Dan, and Tom to man the show for some chat about Spyro, EA’s horrible launch of Battlefront 2, and more than enough nerding out over Mega Man.
 length: 01:59:07
Mon, 30 Oct 2017
We go trick or treating and end up with a sweet, tasty Mario Odyssey, but unfortunately somebody also added a turd to our bags named Silent Hill 3.
 length: 02:16:21
Mon, 23 Oct 2017
Let’s pickle! It’s-a-time for some Mario 64, where Mario is less than amused to find a little present in a urinal. We also chat (at length) about our legendary trip to Mike’s wedding.
 length: 02:03:42
Mon, 16 Oct 2017
Brace yourself… this got out of hand.
 length: 02:31:59
Mon, 18 Sep 2017
Mike gets thrown under the bus after last week’s shambles, Eric tries to justify Destiny 2, and we go fastor through Sonice the Hedgepig 3 and Knerkles the Enchilada.
 length: 02:24:06
Tue, 05 Sep 2017
We’re trekking back to the Master System and exploring the magic of Wonderboy 3: The Dragon’s Trap, but not before stopping off to talk about the rest of Horizon, some Uncharted Lost Legacy, renting used games, and make a face out of some trousers hiked up to one man’s nipples.
 length: 02:26:35
Tue, 22 Aug 2017
We’re Gilberting all over the place as super fan and living meme Dan C. Gilbert joins us to discuss Sonic Mania, Sonice the Hedgepig, and Zelda: Links’ Awakening.
 length: 03:08:36
Mon, 07 Aug 2017
It’s a Crisis of Dinosaurs! One might even say it’s a Dino Crisis. We don our power plant engineering outfits to S.O.R.T. out some dinosaur turd; helped along the way by a new visitor named Bort and a few bouts of impromptu singing related to a very specific individual.
 length: 02:16:54
Mon, 24 Jul 2017
We adjust our drip lines and set off into the night in search of a Super NES Classic Edition only to find a FamicomBox, a Panasonic Q, and an impossibly linear path to Dracula in Super Castlevania IV.
 length: 02:04:49
Mon, 17 Jul 2017
Much merriment is in the air as Montague Glover himself joins us for a chat about Yoshi’s Island and Final Fantasy XII: The Zodiac Age. Meanwhile, Mike attempts to steal everyone’s catchphrases for his own, with disastrous results.
 length: 02:07:27
Tue, 11 Jul 2017
We’ve plugged our Black & Deckers into the Matrix to guide cheesy wotsit Jake through Shadowrun, but not before stopping off to discuss the finer points of the Crash N Sane trilogy.
 length: 02:03:09
Mon, 19 Jun 2017
Mike is declared an official podcast member and instantly says the worst thing ever before the Final Fantasy victory ham horn blares triumphantly as we breed some chocobos, summon some Knights of the Rounds, and spend hours fighting magical pots as we roll the credits on Final Fantasy VII.
 length: 01:34:31
Mon, 05 Jun 2017
Tom’s back from Japan, just in time to help Aerith-th-th-th, SEXY, Cloud (or Tom), Ket Shee, Foul-Mouthed Cid, Cool Vincent, Red Dog Thing, Big Barret and Useless Yuffie continue their adventure through Final Fantasy VII.
 length: 03:06:24
Mon, 22 May 2017
Eric meets a potential serial killer while we polish off our Buster Swords, equip our best materia, and begin the first part of our deep dive into the gaming masterpiece that is Final Fantasy 7. Expect many Kleenex to be consumed.
 length: 02:51:17
Mon, 08 May 2017
The world heavyweight champion and serial ear eater Mike Tyson joins us to talk Earthworm Jim 1 and 2, a ballerina you don’t want to watch, and Jives, the perpetually grooving butler.
 length: 01:50:37
Sat, 29 Apr 2017
Alundra, unfortunately, takes a slight turn for the worse as we progress into the second half, Nintendo baffles us with their decision to discontinue the NES Classic, and we all learn that taking relationship advice from Dan is a bad idea.
 length: 01:18:46
Tue, 11 Apr 2017
If there’s one thing we could say about this show, it’s that it’ll probably give you a massive Bonaire as we play through the first half of the classic RPG, Alundstalkorrrrrr (or Alundra).
 length: 01:11:52
Sun, 26 Mar 2017
Mountains are climbed (pointlessly) and we learn that saving on Crash Bandicoot is even stupider than naming a character Willy the Wombat.
 length: 01:24:30
Mon, 27 Feb 2017
There’s just enough time for a bit more debate about the Nintendo Switch, Zelda Breath of the Wild, and Tom’s trip to Japan before good old Nemmy – in a bizarre turn of events – is finally defeated by Ronnie Pickering as we finish Resident Evil 3: Nemesis.
 length: 01:38:14
Tue, 21 Feb 2017
Tom finds his way back to the show to help support the Vita, fawn over the new Final Fantasy VII remake screens, and bubble over the lovely 2.5D platformer we probably all missed – Klonoa: Door to Phantomile.
 length: 01:38:17
Tue, 14 Feb 2017
The battle against Doctor Smooth Area takes a dramatic turn as Eric develops laser eyes! We (nearly) finish Super Mario RPG, discuss upcoming games, chat about emulation and a take a look at a new all-in-one console called the RetroBlox.
 length: 01:35:41
Tue, 07 Feb 2017
It’s with a tearful wave that we say goodbye to Jess. Eric and Dan share their favorite Jess moments before trying to make sense of the Kingdom Hearts series, invent an alternate RPG franchise, and dissect the first half of Super Mario RPG.
 length: 01:19:51
Mon, 16 Jan 2017
We react to the Nintendo Switch, Jess contracts the G-Virus and manages to miss our playthrough of Resident Evil 2 (although we didn’t notice) and we reveal the winners of our Card Fighter competition.
 length: 02:15:33
Tue, 10 Jan 2017
After playing Ico (with mixed feelings), Eric’s inner desire to protect his family manifests itself in a quite thrilling, but quite stupid way as he partakes in an epic car chase across Arizona, aided by his mother.
 length: 01:31:49
Sat, 31 Dec 2016
2016 may have been shit, but there were still plenty of games to love! We pick our top ten games of the year and buff some smooth areas in the process.
 length: 02:19:38
Thu, 22 Dec 2016
Ho ho ho, it’s the Factory Sealed Christmas show! Inside, you’ll find many neatly wrapped presents including a bread wren, a Grandma that falls over, and the sweet, sweet memories of things that happened in 2016 during Factory Sealed. Oh, and Maniac Mansion.
 length: 01:46:30
Mon, 12 Dec 2016
Jeeves, tell Jeeves to inform Jeeves to tell masters Ericolius, Iggytom, and Dantis that we have washed their clothes in the toilet and prepared a right good Final Fantasy extravaganza.
 length: 01:58:04
Mon, 28 Nov 2016
The Carmel Cran and his faithful sidekick, Jockbuns, stop fighting the evil of Dr Smooth Area to discuss Sonic 2’s surprising facts and a bit of Pokemon Sun before inventing a clothing line.
 length: 01:21:13
Mon, 21 Nov 2016
A wild man-hunting chin hair appears as we discuss Pokemon Sun and Moon before the Master fails again to save the word in Soul Blazer!
 length: 01:45:14
Sat, 12 Nov 2016
Join Sir Jockbuns and Dead Scarlett Johannson as they play god in ActRaiser, debate the mini NES, discuss review ethics, and learn about a very special summer car.
 length: 01:36:04
Sun, 06 Nov 2016
Jess proves turning 30 isn’t as good as dying, by being basically dead, we all fail to get Samoose to the end of Super Metroid, and a winner is chosen for the Mini NES competition.
 length: 01:38:42
Mon, 31 Oct 2016
This Halloween we tackle Silent Hill 2 and join James Sunderland as he ventures into his own personal hell to look for his wife. Her name is Mary. She sent him a letter. Have you seen her? She’s dead.
 length: 02:16:31
Mon, 24 Oct 2016
Slip on your neon leg warmers on, perm that hair, and join us as we go back to the 80’s for a spot of GTA: Vice City and stop off for some discussion about the Nintendo Switch, Red Dead Redemption 2, and find out for yourself just how incredibly stupid one man can be when he describes a competition.
 length: 02:07:12
Mon, 17 Oct 2016
We unveil a new contest and come to a rather uncommon consensus about The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past while Jess begins the slow descent into Crazy Cat Lady by extreme vetting her online dates.
 length: 01:13:17
Fri, 14 Oct 2016
We learn all about mermaid camp, Tom’s awkward erection on the beaches of Greece, and start our adventure through the kingdom of Hyrule in The Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past.
 length: 00:58:00
Fri, 30 Sep 2016
After 14 years, Eric finally makes it to the end of Dark Cloud 2 while Dan watches (with envy) a documentary about a very disturbing method of painting.
 length: 01:18:17
Sun, 25 Sep 2016
Is there any Dick in Richard? Is Driver any good outside of Russian accents? Why is MediEvil called MediEvil and just what in the hell are sarnies and pease pudding anyway?
 length: 01:37:01
Mon, 05 Sep 2016
Allo comrades, this week, we are driving you crazy with discussion of Wario Land, larders v pantries and very, very poor accents.
 length: 01:27:45
Mon, 29 Aug 2016
We hit things with wrenches, build entire towns, race fish, and even stop off for a spot of golf as we tackle the first half of Dark Cloud 2.
 length: 01:57:25
Tue, 16 Aug 2016
Yee Haw! It’s Harvest Moon time. All ya’ll younguns best hike up yer britches and get to. Them taters and maters ain’t gonna grow themselves!
 length: 01:52:00
Tue, 09 Aug 2016
Join us for a whimsical, thought-provoking romp through the history of the Game Boy series, as well as Kirby’s Dreamland 1 and 2! Oh, and keys in the shitter.
 length: 02:21:47
Tue, 02 Aug 2016
Long-time listener, fan, and awesome dude Jack Grant joins us for an absolute shitshow of an episode with curling irons in wrong places, Banjo Kazooie, and the worst question ever. Seriously. Ever.
 length: 02:25:09
Tue, 19 Jul 2016
We get Mysty-eyed as Myst proves to be more trouble than it’s really worth, send an evil gargoyle to his repeated death in Demon’s Crest and get far too obsessed with Pokemon Go.
 length: 01:30:03
Mon, 04 Jul 2016
As we regain our memories in the bizarre hybrid of 80’s sci-fi known as Flashback: The Quest for Identity, the crew discuss patriotic games in honor of ‘Murica day and why the English burn people on bonfires before setting off fireworks.
 length: 01:40:59
Mon, 27 Jun 2016
Two weeks was ample time to delve into Landstalker and its world of ludicrous controls, ballet brothels, and tricky platforming. Dan finishes, Tom goes missing, Jess leaves before the end of the show, and Eric gets drunk and plays Smash Brothers instead.
 length: 01:54:52
Tue, 14 Jun 2016
Inexplicable lesbianism and robotic crotch-hugging bugs feature heavily as we play Fear Effect 2: Retro Helix, just after discovering that Dan lives in the past and that internet wires are meant to stay plugged in.
 length: 02:02:07
Mon, 06 Jun 2016
With a century of episodes behind us we celebrate by playing The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time, sharing your favorite memories of the show, and sending a ghost to attack someone’s room by giving away the Jeeves box (and loads of other prizes!
 length: 02:53:34
Mon, 16 May 2016
There’s much to be discovered this week: we learn that Castlevania Bloodlines stars a real-life serial killer, go on the hunt for treasure in the super-shiny Uncharted 4, and reveal our plans for the mysterious Jeeves Box (mmm, quite).
 length: 01:39:11
Mon, 09 May 2016
Dan made it home from Australia just in time for Jess to go mysteriously missing. In all the confusion, everyone forgot to play a game, but that doesn’t stop us from talking about what else we’re playing, Nintendo NX/Nintendo’s mad plans, this week’s big gaming news, and the many eccentricities of the land down under.
 length: 01:33:58
Wed, 04 May 2016
Scheduling conflicts aside, Eric and Jess team up to explore the universe of Ratchet & Clank, work on their Dan impressions, join a motorcycle gang, get in a bar fight, and analyze the depths of gaming memories in this ultra soft polyester blend edition of Factory Sealed.
 length: 01:24:19
Mon, 25 Apr 2016
Strap on your flight suit, give your jock buns a squeeze, and prepare your lug holes! We’re taking flight with Star Fox, Star Fox 64, and the cancelled Star Fox 2. We’ve also got more details on our monumental 100th episode and the mysterious Jeeves Box.
 length: 02:17:25
Wed, 13 Apr 2016
Violence is abounding this week as we subject ourselves to the undeniably terrible, but historically important Night Trap. We also weigh in on that Nintendo Zapper themed pistol, fighting games in general, and the most memorable games from each console.
 length: 02:05:11
Mon, 04 Apr 2016
Fully regrouped, the whole crew reunites and is joined by longtime listener/fan/awesome guy Matt Earney to discuss the crazy world of Undertale, the impending arrival of Final Fantasy XV, and the silky smoothness of Tom’s ‘area’.
 length: 02:39:46
Fri, 01 Apr 2016
A lost continent rises from the depths of the sea, Goddess Maira plunges the world into darkness, Narcia struggles to overcome her emotions, and Pietro wonders if he has it in him to save those he loves. Join Eric and Tom as they roll the credits on Story 3 of the exceptional PoPoLoCrois.
 length: 02:48:12
Tue, 29 Mar 2016
Eric moves to the moon, Dan build’s an island out of children’s tears, and John Wayne’s horse joins to discuss Heart of Darkness, Salt and Sanctuary, and Batman vs Super man, all while failing to avoid using old man voices on this inaugural episode of the Factory Sealed Cheese and Pottery Podcast.
 length: 01:24:10
Mon, 21 Mar 2016
As Eric and Dan unite once more for a two-man show, we learn that Sonic Adventure is a marvelous turd, get put in our place by an Australian, tell way too many immature penis jokes, point out more segues, and debate the future of Playstation VR.
 length: 01:31:51
Tue, 15 Mar 2016
Eric and Tom unite in Vegas in actual real life and join forces with Dan and Jess to thwart Craig’s Vague Plague in Red Faction, discuss Pokemon Red, and argue about what constitutes an animal for best animal companion in a retro game.
 length: 01:43:30
Mon, 07 Mar 2016
Mystery is afoot as the crew tries to make sense of the police detective/airborne kung-fu simulator know as Indigo Prophecy/Fahrenheit, stopping off along the way to talk Zelda Twilight Princess HD, Super Smash Brothers, Amiibo collecting obsessions, and the fate of Nathan Drake.
 length: 01:58:26
Tue, 01 Mar 2016
We play The Sims and in the process create a pseudo podium polisher, a bizarre pool torture chamber, and an adult with awkward incontinence issues, proving once and for all that we can’t care for anything more complex than a potato.
 length: 01:19:51
Tue, 23 Feb 2016
Despite a spectacular late arrival from Tom the Technophobe, the whole crew unites to annoy Eric by arguing that all games are RPGs. Also, learn how to be a good parent, gain more knowledge about Megaman X than you could possibly ever need, and enjoy the briefest celebration of Zelda’s 30th anniversary you’ve ever heard.
 length: 01:34:48
Tue, 16 Feb 2016
Eric and Dan partner up to deliver a very intimate two man Valentine’s Day show filled with brooms, hobs, aubergines, and the possessed farts of a doomed mudoken from Oddworld: Abe’s Exoddus.
 length: 01:27:26
Mon, 08 Feb 2016
What what tally ho old bean! Put on your monocle, get your upper lip as stiff as possible and listen to us talk about Grim Fandango, the death of guides, and Eric’s gradual transformation into a cyborg.
 length: 01:53:36
Tue, 02 Feb 2016
Even a broken collarbone can’t stop Eric from making a triumphant return to talk nonsense with the crew! Highlights include finishing Paper Mario, an extended discussion of toilet etiquette, and a good dollop of Final Fantasy Explorers/Final Fantasy XV chat.
 length: 01:59:40
Mon, 18 Jan 2016
Perhaps foolishly, Jess and Tom go AWOL and let Dan and Eric man the show. As a result, we discuss British pinky etiquette, inexplicably sexual gaming adverts of yesteryear, the beautiful simplicity of Paper Mario and FFXIII’s Lightning’s new career as a fashion model.
 length: 01:36:51
Mon, 11 Jan 2016
Although we Have No Mouth and Cannot Scream, we still manage to achieve new levels of stupidity and talk about baked bean cultural differences, Eric’s lottery-winning ambitions, and sexism within 60’s fiction.
 length: 01:57:31
Tue, 05 Jan 2016
Christmas happened! We reveal our top games of 2015 (with an FS twist), Tom reveals his in-progress Eric impression, and we all debate the technicalities of punting.
 length: 01:50:42
Mon, 21 Dec 2015
To the amazement of the crew, everyone (yes, including Jess) manages to finish a game, Eric purchases a Wii U and has his heart melted by wooly dinosaurs, and Beneath a Steel Sky proves to be perhaps the most sexual-reference-filled game in existence.
 length: 01:33:40
Mon, 14 Dec 2015
The Galaxy is explored in a pirate ship in Rogue Galaxy, everyone denounces Wipeout 64 as clearly inferior to the Playstation version, and Eric falls madly in love with running over cows in a truck equipped with drills.
 length: 01:26:53
Fri, 11 Dec 2015
Gather round kids! Queen Sania may be saved, but darkness awaits the Lion Hearted king of PoPoLocrois. Eric and Tom join Pietro et al for the second story of their whimsical adventure.
 length: 01:49:35
Mon, 07 Dec 2015
Factory Sealed’s plot to take over the world is revealed, everyone nerds out over the Final Fantasy 7 Remake trailer, and everyone except Dan decides to preserve their happy childhood memories and stops playing Tomb Raider 2.
 length: 01:37:14
Mon, 30 Nov 2015
Phone sex operator Jess returns, cars are on fire, Super Star Wars is absurdly difficult, and apparently 600 clicks on a screen tell us our top games of all time.
 length: 01:46:20
Mon, 16 Nov 2015
Jess sleeps through the nuclear apocalypse as Eric, Dan and Tom discuss Fallout 4 and accidentally manage to play various versions of Kirby.
 length: 01:26:46
Mon, 09 Nov 2015
Slip into your favorite jammies and snuggle in with Eric and Tom as they whisk you away on magical journey to the whimsical land of PoPoLoCrois.
 length: 02:30:43
Wed, 04 Nov 2015
Chrono Trigger consistently ranks near top in the pantheon of gaming gods, but does it really deserve to be there? We think so.
 length: 03:01:58
Mon, 02 Nov 2015
Silent Hill raises more questions than it actually answers. Questions like “What happened to this town?” and “What’s going on with that radio?” But most importantly, “Have you seen a little girl? Short, black hair? Just turned seven last month?”
 length: 02:17:43
Mon, 26 Oct 2015
Halloween is still a week away, but that doesn’t stop us from talking about loads of cosplay, our favorite memories from working at a game shop, tech decks, and the last half of Psychonauts and how it almost didn’t happen.
 length: 01:43:47
Mon, 12 Oct 2015
Play Battlefront you must – come, make laser noises and learn about the walkey-things. Then lie back, sniff some bacon, and listen as brain experts Eric and Dan delve deep into the mind and talk everything Psychonauts.
 length: 01:32:29
Mon, 05 Oct 2015
With our collective brain power we attempt to answer some of this week’s more pressing questions: What happened to the Tony Hawk Series? Where did Ethan Carter go? And just who is Ronnie Pickering?
 length: 01:21:02
Mon, 28 Sep 2015
The force is not strong with us. We channel our inner pod racer with Star Wars Episode 1: Racer and Jess lights her truck on fire in the process. Eric and Dan finish Metal Gear Solid V and lament over the mixed emotions they are left with.
 length: 01:19:47
Mon, 21 Sep 2015
We get existential with developer Will O’Neill as we wax philosophical about his semi-autobiographical creation Actual Sunlight. We’re are we going? Is this all worth it? Who knows. Just don’t go to the roof.
 length: 01:24:18
Mon, 14 Sep 2015
20 years of PlayStation memories, a few questionable Mario purchases, and two plausibly confirmed myths regarding Mario 3 and the true familial loins from which Bowser Jr. was cast forth. Wot?
 length: 01:23:52
Mon, 07 Sep 2015
Eric and Dan hold the fort as Jess and Tom are possibly currently deceased. Discover whether Crash Bash is a euphemism, how Kiefer Sutherland sucks as Snake, and revel in the debut of the Random Game Generator!
 length: 00:56:40
Mon, 31 Aug 2015
Dan taunts us with his early copy of Metal Gear Solid V: The Phantom Pain while the rest of us prepare by brushing up on our combat skills with Metal Gear Solid: VR Missions and King of the Monsters.
 length: 01:15:04
Fri, 28 Aug 2015
Often revered as one of the greatest RPGs of its era, The Legend of Dragoon feels more like a summer filled with household chores than a game worthy of such high praise. But does it have enough for us to see it through to the end?
 length: 01:11:24
Mon, 24 Aug 2015
Rocket Knight Adventures sends us wandering down a very dark and twisted path in search of answers to why all the pigs take their clothes off when they die.
 length: 01:19:42
Mon, 17 Aug 2015
We wrap up our thoughts on The Legend of Zelda: The Minish Cap, but not before we dissect the crack-level addictive qualities of Rocket League.
 length: 01:28:33
Thu, 06 Aug 2015
Dan admits he’s wrong for the first time ever as we discuss how despite being the tiniest Zelda game, the Minish Cap may also be one of the best.
 length: 00:59:14
Mon, 27 Jul 2015
We don our running sneakooors and accompany Sonic on his slowest fetch quest yet in Sonic 3D Blast. Unfortunately, we return with only a drunkenly opened suitcase and a single flesh tunnel.
 length: 01:08:25
Thu, 23 Jul 2015
We travel back in time to the land of Turok: Dinosaur Hunter and try to reprogram our brains to comprehend the controls, all while Jess eludes a crazy window stalker.
 length: 01:05:56
Mon, 13 Jul 2015
We’re out to settle the long-standing debate of which kart racer is the best. Mario Kart 64, Diddy Kong Racing, or Crash Team Racing? With a gun to our pouses, we are forced to crown a victor.
 length: 01:42:02
Sun, 05 Jul 2015
Tom regales us with tales of the British government while we pretend to love the entirety of Battletoads, when in fact we only made it as far as we did because we took the time to memorize the first three levels.
 length: 01:09:10
Wed, 01 Jul 2015
It’s actually happening! Our thoughts on the Final Fantasy VII remake, Batman Forever, True Lies, and giant, menacing Haboobs as we welcome Tom to the crew.
 length: 01:34:02
Sun, 14 Jun 2015
8-Bit Baby joins us to discuss lullabies and Mega Man 2 while Dan struggles to figure out why he can’t keep his electricity turned on.
 length: 01:22:15
Tue, 09 Jun 2015
Oliver Aguilar joins us once again in an attempt to explain the plot of Metal Gear Solid to Jess, Eric outlines the particulars of Urban Golf and Potato Baseball, and Dan stuns everyone with just how poorly he pronounces Konami.
 length: 01:45:39
Thu, 21 May 2015
Final Fantasy 8 is finally over! We’ve compressed time. One of us beat Omega. Ultimecia has fallen. And Squall goes back in time to set in motion the events that kicked this whole thing off in the first place.
 length: 01:32:21
Mon, 18 May 2015
We made it past 50! We celebrate with E.V.O.: Search for Eden and Wild Guns, introduce Factory Sealed Relives, mourn a crashed Mac HDD, and revile some of our most overrated retro games.
 length: 01:07:50
Wed, 13 May 2015
It’s all coming into focus. Squall is finally opening up, Rinoa is a Sorceress, Laguna is President, and monsters are falling from the moon. But who is Ultimecia and how are the past, present, and future going to become one?
 length: 01:48:50
Mon, 11 May 2015
A review of Excitebike 64 that doesn’t jive well with history, Axiom Verge and modern retro games,  the unsurprisingly terrible Toy Story 2 (GBC), and not surprisingly terrible Race Drivin’. No semis allowed.
 length: 01:08:18
Mon, 04 May 2015
Toilet lip gloss, Streets of Rage 2, Road Rash 2, Casper, the best console of all time, and perhaps the most disgustingly feminine way possible to get drunk.
 length: 01:26:45
Mon, 27 Apr 2015
Dan went to Japan. Eric and Jess decide to open an inappropriately name Etsy shop. Some more Majora’s Mask, Hot Shots Golf, and Ecco the Dolphin.
 length: 01:08:37
Thu, 23 Apr 2015
Is Squall really dead? Who is Ellone and why is she sending everyone back in time? Did the sorceress really create SeeD knowing it would be the end of her? What’s going on?!
 length: 01:38:40
Sun, 12 Apr 2015
The prodigal son has returned! Dan Curtis joins the crew to talk about Bloodborne, Majora’s Mask, Final Fantasy Type-0 HD, and the sure-to-be-banned-everywhere video game adaptation of 50 Shades of Grey.
 length: 01:27:11
Sun, 08 Feb 2015
A relative newcomer, a seasoned Final Fantasy veteran, a low level runner, and a wild conspiracy theorist converge upon the first disc of one of the most polarizing Final Fantasy games ever.
 length: 01:36:17
Fri, 06 Feb 2015
That which was once thought impossible has been done. Eric and Jess have completed perhaps the longest game proposed on the show: Suikoden. Final thoughts within.
 length: 01:08:40
Mon, 19 Jan 2015
More Suikoden, Diddy Kong Racing vs. Mario Kart 64, the New Nintendo 3DS XL Majora’s Mask console, and revisiting Ducktails as Eric and Jess set aside their scheduling conflicts and slap together an hour long show.
 length: 00:57:32
Wed, 24 Dec 2014
It’s that time of year again when you secretly hope every gift is another game, but tragically ends up being socks and underwear. (Or maybe your games came wrapped in socks and underwear.) The crew assembles to share their favorite Christmas video game memories and listen to viewer submissions in this very special holiday episode.
 length: 01:36:01
Sat, 20 Dec 2014
Suikoden, growing up with Zelda, how we named our kids, rage quitting, and at what age is it OK to start playing games with your kids are all up for discussion in this special pre-Christmas, two brown colored star show.
 length: 01:22:27
Fri, 12 Dec 2014
From the ashes of podcasts past, we’ve arisen… again! (For the 3rd time.) We’re back with a new format, new games, a new co-host and in honor of its 20th birthday, lots of PlayStation nostalgia.
 length: 01:55:26
Sun, 15 Jun 2014
A baby was born. A break was had. A game was played… hopefully. We’re back! Kind of…
 length: 01:10:05
Fri, 21 Feb 2014
Phantasy Star IV, Space Station Silicon Valley, and a whole lot of crushed hopes make their way through the Canadian snow storm in this philosophical, entirely PETA-friendly edition of Factory Sealed.
 length: 01:26:22
Thu, 06 Feb 2014
Conker’s Bad Fur Day, Rad Racer, Star Wars Episode I: Racer, heart shaped eye implants, fingernail scoops, and WAY too much talk about poop.
 length: 01:27:24
Thu, 23 Jan 2014
Crash Bandicoot’s Huge Adventure, Lufia & the Fortress of Doom, returning $2 games, and a morale debate regarding an invading alien race and a baby polar bear’s neck.
 length: 01:43:49
Thu, 16 Jan 2014
Yoshi’s Island, 5 Days a Stranger, and Shadow of the Colossus are up for discussion in this week’s completely opinion-free, Bible study show.
 length: 01:40:13
Thu, 09 Jan 2014
The Holiday Hiatus is over and we’re back with chat of trips, birthdays, resolutions, FF IV, tons of emails, and a solid defense as to why RE 4 isn’t good.
 length: 01:52:57
Thu, 19 Dec 2013
Old school Fallout, The Elder Scrolls III: Morrowind, the impending decline of the video game market, and a generous helping of emails are piled high and topped with a sweet mustache and crammed inside a JTT sandwich.
 length: 02:01:12
Thu, 12 Dec 2013
Jess uncovers the joy of playing the RTS pacifist, Eric gives Mega Man X another chance, and Kev decides he hates Mother 3.
 length: 01:30:37
Thu, 05 Dec 2013
Apparently it’s Capcom week. We’re going to force you to sit and listen to us babble on about black Friday, the diminishing quality of fast food service, and more games than you can shake a stick at and you know what? You’re going to like it.
 length: 01:36:57
Thu, 28 Nov 2013
Happy Thanksgiving! Eric and Aron celebrate with talks of Zelda: A Link Between Worlds and other desired HD remake/sequel/homages, the progression of RPGs, and just how much it sucks to have your entire gaming collection stolen.
 length: 01:22:25
Thu, 21 Nov 2013
Professional illustrator and artist esquire Rob Duenas from Sketchcraft shares some insight into the comic and game art industry. Also, we discuss the best and worst console launches of all time, Mother 3 Ch. 4, and learn just how well Aron handled his ‘all cleric’ Eye of the Beholder Party.
 length: 01:50:22
Thu, 14 Nov 2013
Retro sports games, more Goof Troop, Mega Man X, and… kitten farts? We wander into some really dark territory many times over in our first ever attempt at live streaming the show.
 length: 01:39:34
Thu, 07 Nov 2013
We discover an evil Nazi plot hidden deep within Ch 3 of Mother 3 and discuss the joys of single player co-op games while relaxing in an oddly shaped hot spring.
 length: 01:25:20
Thu, 31 Oct 2013
Happy Halloween! Let’s talk about some scary games. Demon’s Crest, Fatal Frame, Silent Hill, and a whole slew of personal ghost stories are creepily whispered over your shoulder in this edition of the scariest retro gaming podcast ever.
 length: 01:54:53
Thu, 24 Oct 2013
Spyro the Dragon, Star Wars: Shadows of the Empire, The Firemen, video game immortality, and a plethora of useless cheat codes are here to save you on the only podcast willing to enter through the east exit…
 length: 01:46:28
Thu, 17 Oct 2013
We desperately try to unveil the identity of Aron’s Seattle stalker, talk about some Mother 3: Ch 2 (Finally!), and read a whole ton of emails.
 length: 01:25:07
Wed, 02 Oct 2013
Two weeks in a row?! We know. Impressive. So how about you hop on our tour bus and let us talk to you about goth concerts, Earthworm Jim, Shaq Fu, and vegan spit salads.
 length: 01:11:21
Thu, 26 Sep 2013
We’re baaaaaaaaack! We haven’t played anything, but that doesn’t stop us from catching up and talking about some GTA.
 length: 00:54:48
Fri, 05 Jul 2013
Aron bows out for the summer leaving Kev to swoop in and save the day with talk of Doom, Ceaser III, and retro games with the most emotional endings.
 length: 01:05:48
Tue, 02 Jul 2013
Eric and Kevin imbibe in some over-sized drinks and dissect the inner workings of Final Fantasy VI.
 length: 01:57:03
Fri, 17 May 2013
Oliver “Swagger” Aguilar joins us to discuss Castlevania: Symphony of the Night, Secret of Mana, Mega Man Soccer, and Rock n’ Roll Racing before helping us take our first ever batch of listener call-ins.
 length: 01:58:40
Fri, 03 May 2013
Zombies Ate My Neighbors, Little Nemo: Dream Master, and Zelda II all stay longer than Aron on the longest 15 inch podcast you’ll ever lay eyes on.
 length: 01:07:09
Sun, 21 Apr 2013
Eric and Aron give in to their masochistic tendencies with yet another week of The Immortal and some Mega Man 4 while Jess concludes that getting inked is the only proper way to immortalize her cat.
 length: 01:28:00
Sat, 06 Apr 2013
We asked for this! Elias Toufexis joins us in discussing all things nostalgic and learns the shocking truth behind Super Mario Bros. 2 and the cross-dressing, gender confused Birdo.
 length: 01:08:35
Sat, 23 Mar 2013
Holy Podcast, Batman! Toronto Batman drops by to discuss every Batman game imaginable and break as few bones as possible in the process.
 length: 01:30:25
Sun, 17 Mar 2013
Where in Time is Carmen Sandiego, Mario’s Time Machine, 10 Yard Fight, Base Wars, Top Gun, and Aces are dialed into the Chronoskimmer as Aron and Eric soldier on without Jess.
 length: 01:45:27
Fri, 08 Mar 2013
The glory of Sunset Riders, Golden Sun, Blast Corps, and Cross-Canadian Trucking Math Simulators comes crashing down thanks to the buzzkilling title known as Goof Troop.
 length: 01:40:34
Fri, 01 Mar 2013
Aladdin vs. Aladdin, Pilotwings, and the psychology behind video game addiction are lifted into the stirrups in this exceptionally equine edition of Factory Sealed.
 length: 01:51:42
Mon, 18 Feb 2013
Aron steps out to assume his fatherly duties, leaving Eric and Jess to swap tender Valentine’s day stories and philosophize about the deeper meaning of Link’s Awakening.
 length: 01:26:01
Fri, 08 Feb 2013
Special guest Kevin Beier wakes up from his evening nap to come talk about The Little Mermaid, Blaster Master, the first half of Link’s Awakening, and an apparently non-existent game whose sole point is to not commit suicide.
 length: 01:43:20
Thu, 31 Jan 2013
The crew treads dangerously into movie game territory with Harry Potter before diving face first into the addicting world of Pokemon Yellow. All while Jess does her absolute best to derail the show right from the outset.
 length: 01:43:48
Fri, 18 Jan 2013
Retro gaming in Canadaland, Parasite Eve, and how Aron felt the need to take his feelings about Pong to the local news. All that and more in the very first episode of Factory Sealed to grace 2013.
 length: 01:26:29
Wed, 12 Dec 2012
Syphon Filter, Mutant League Football, Brave Fencer Musashi, and severe head trauma are all fashionably late to the best dream interpreting retro gaming podcast ever.
 length: 01:43:05
Wed, 21 Nov 2012
Illusion of Gaia, the fall of the almighty Sega, and the long lost art of cartography are dropped into the View Master in this totally Hipster-free edition of the greatest retro video game podcast this side of yesterday.
 length: 01:40:30
Fri, 26 Oct 2012
After a lengthy absence the crew is back all dressed to the nines and ready to wine and dine you into the evening with Bucky O’Hare, Dragon Power, and a strangely curious Smurf fetish.
 length: 01:06:13
Fri, 05 Oct 2012
Rygar, Metroid, hippie beer markets, and freak escalator accidents make up the lion’s share of this particular trip down memory lane.
 length: 01:23:46
Thu, 20 Sep 2012
Faxanadu, FBI Emulator Shakedowns, and retro soundtracks are all lined up for your listening pleasure as we approach the ‘handful of weeks until the end of the world’ mark.
 length: 01:05:57
Thu, 06 Sep 2012
Celebrity slumber parties, Super Marryo Bros., voicemails to Ben, and a whole lot of “tens” are par for the course as we return to our retro roots in this inaugural episode of Factory Sealed.
 length: 01:07:57